Torture

Torture is the best word I can think of to describe IVF. Pure torture. I am feeling so awful right now. I am bloated and crampy and it hurts to sit and walk and pee. I just want to lay down and be still until this is over. According to the doctor I'm "almost there", which is good because I don't know how much longer I can live this way.

I had more blood work and another ultrasound today. I was pretty shocked at the scene unfolding in my pelvic region. My ovaries are humongous! I have approximately 40 measurable follicles between both ovaries. They range in size from 11mm to 21mm. My ovaries are so big they are almost touching! Its really no wonder why I'm so uncomfortable. My estrogen level increased from 1,002 to 1,815 since Wednesday.

When I was having my ultrasound this morning my doctor talked to me about the possibility of hyperstimulation. Having so many follicles usually leads to that. He said he didn't want my estrogen level to go up past 3,000 so I'm glad I'm not there. I do wish it was a little higher though because now they want me to continue my shots for another day. I have to do 50iu of Follistim tonight and tomorrow and 5 units of Lupron tomorrow and go back in for another ultrasound and more blood work at 7am tomorrow morning. Nice way to start a Saturday, jab myself in the gut, get jabbed in the arm, and then get molested with the dildo cam. All before 8am!

I'm just so ready for this to be over! I don't know how women go through this process multiple times. I don't ever want to do it again. It has been really hard on my body. I just want to feel better. Hopefully once they get the eggs out things will feel a little better. Or, I'll get pregnant and just continue to feel bad which, in that case, will make this all worthwhile. Stay tuned for tomorrow's episode of "As the Ovaries Turn".