I don't understand people sometimes. I don't know if people just don't know the rule, "if you don't have anything nice to say..." then shut the fuck up. That's how it goes right? Maybe they just have no idea how to use their internal edit button. Whatever it is, I've been encountering some real assholes lately. And usually I'm so caught off guard by the crazy things people say that I usually just grin and bear it, then stew about it silently all day and come home and explode. So, I thought maybe you all could give me some helpful hints on how to deal with the following scenarios.
Jackass number one is a lady that I work with. I don't know if she feels threatened by my awesomeness or she's just sad that she is no longer as awesome as she thinks she is but she loves to give backward compliments. The lady is fifty and you can tell that she used to be a really pretty woman. But now her face is really wrinkly, especially around the mouth, and she's got cellulite on her calves. She likes to make comments about how I dress. Like one day I was wearing a summer scarf and she told me I looked like a flight attendant. Another day I was wearing black, peep toe heels and she made a big fuss about how sexy they were. Another day I was wearing black pants, a black v-neck t-shirt, and a black and white zebra print scarf and she was like, "whooooo... sexy". Now, I don't go into my closet in the morning looking for something sexy to put on. That's not how I want to portray myself, especially at work. It makes me mad that she would immediately go to that reaction. It makes me doubt what I put on and makes me feel like I'm making a bad impression. Even though she's the only person that ever says anything like that to me. Its annoying and I just want to tell her and her cellulite cankles to fuck off. But normally I either don't say anything or say thank you. I don't know what the appropriate response is to that.
Two weeks ago I wore my hair straight and ran into jackasses number two and three. People love to make comments on my hair, especially when its straight, so I'm kind of used to them and prepared for it. But these two nim-wads took it a step further. The guy was commenting on my hair and saying that he liked it and said, while making hand gestures around his own head, that it makes my head "look smaller". Uhhhhh... huh?! Then his partner in jackassness chimed in and said, "yeah and it looks like you're wearing less makeup... definitely not as heavy as usual." Well, I was wearing the EXACT makeup that I wear everyday. But thanks for letting me know that on a normal day that I look like a big headed drag queen. Makes me feel really great about wearing my hair curly again. I understand that these people were trying to pay me a compliment but they were doing it at the expense of "regular" me. Just because I have straight hair doesn't mean I don't have feelings. And those two just trampled them.
The worst offender, by far, came last week. I'm the first to admit that lately I've been putting on some weight. I've probably gained 6-7 pounds over the last couple of months. I feel gross and unattractive and my clothes don't fit as well as they used to. I've only got three pairs of pants that I can wear comfortably all day. So, last week I was feeling particularly hefty and decided to wear a dress to work. I like dresses because there is no constricting waistband and they kind of flow around my mid-section. The dress I was wearing that day wasn't real flowy but definitely wasn't tight. I had a customer come in who was a really nice older man. I was sitting at my desk and he walked up in front of it, looked down at my stomach area and said, "well, when" I immediately knew what he had just assumed (that I was pregnant and he wanted to know my due date) but I was so shocked I didn't know what to say. So, I gave him my evilest bitch look and said, "when what". And he didn't take the hint! He again looked down at my belly and asked, "when". I repeated, in a bitchier tone than before, "when what". He must've gotten the hint at that point because he just smiled and said, "so everything's going well here, have a good day". I was completely dumbfounded. Don't people know that you should NEVER ask a woman if she's pregnant unless she's like nine months pregnant and her water just broke? I was so upset. But I honestly have no idea what I should've said in that situation. Do I say, no not pregnant... just fat? What do you say?
Anyway, besides the jackasses I've been so fortunate to run into lately, things have been alright here. Our plants in the new landscape are still alive so that's a good thing. The weather is getting cooler here and we've been able to open the windows and let some fresh air in. We may actually get down in the sixties this week so I may have to pull out the first sweater of the season. Winter is definitely not my favorite season of the year but the weather we've been having lately has been pretty nice so I can't complain too much.
I took Joe to the airport this afternoon. He'll be in Atlanta until Thursday for some big medical equipment convention. He's staying at the Ritz in downtown Atlanta. I'm so jealous that I wasn't able to join him but he'll be busy the whole time so I'd be alone most of the time. Oh well, maybe next trip. His family will all be here on Saturday so we're really excited to see them. They're driving down from Alabama and I haven't seen them since last Thanksgiving. It'll be Joe's mom, his sister and her husband and their two little girls. We're going to have a Thanksgiving dinner on Sunday since we won't see them on actual Thanksgiving and then we're all going to Disney on Monday. So, that should be fun.
Anyway, I'll keep you all posted on how my Thanksgiving dinner goes and any new jackasses that I come into contact with. Have a good week!
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Misson Accomplished
Holy crap!! This weekend has been so busy! We've seriously been non-stop since Friday night. We did accomplish everything that we set out to do so, even though it was very busy, I consider it a huge success!
Saturday morning we all got up bright and early, put on our best pink get ups, and headed out to the Strides Against Breast Cancer walk. I was shocked by how emotional it was for me. When I was planning it I thought, oh this will be a nice thing to do and it'll make me feel like I'm doing something to help. It was so much more than that though. When we signed in we were given the opportunity to write who we were walking for on a little placard that we pinned to the backs of our shirts. Something about writing, "Favorite Aunt Patti" on that placard was just so overwhelming. I don't know if that's when it hit me, the gravity of what she's going through/been through but I just started to tear up. And seeing all the people that were there who were survivors of cancer or those who were there to support someone they knew that had cancer or even those walking in honor of someone who died from cancer. It was amazing. But I'm so glad we did it. I think they said that all the participants of the walk we did raised over 1.2 million dollars!! That makes me feel so good. And we all agreed that we want to do it again. Go Patti's Perky Posse!!
While I was walking for the cure, Joe was home prepping the yard for landscaping. He pulled out all our old hedges and took them to the dump, prepped the bed with landscaping mat stuff and got it all smoothed and ready to go for today. We had already planned on going out to dinner that night so we left our landscaping behind and headed out for some sushi. After that, Joe talked me into a movie so we went to see Quarantine. I have no idea why I agreed to see that movie. I purposely shield myself from scary movies because my over-active imagination always gets the best of me. I probably watched 20 minutes of the movie and spent the rest of the hour and 10 minutes with my eyes covered. But even just hearing the movie was enough to scare the crap out of me. If you like scary movies, you'll like Quarantine. It is shot Blair Witch/Cloverfield style but the acting was very good. You truly believe that the characters are scared out of their minds. If you don't like scary movies, stay away!!
Today Joe and I got up nice and early and headed out to Home Depot to get our plants for the yard. It didn't immediately go so well. The plants that we had originally picked out were no longer available so we had to decide on other stuff. We both disagreed about what to get or what would work so we decided to go to Lowe's (across the street) to see what they had. Well, we weren't impressed with that selection either so we went back to Home Depot. The sales people at stores like that are so unhelpful. They really have no idea what they're talking about. We picked out a small bush that we liked and asked the lady in the garden department how big it would get. She said it wouldn't get much bigger than it already was, which was like 12" tall. So we bought some of those and some azaleas and our Fox Tail palm and headed home. When we got here we noticed that our neighbor has the exact same bushes that we bought but his are like 3 and a half feet tall! Dumb Home Depot lady. We ended up taking those back and going to another garden place down in Rockledge, which is now officially my new favorite place, and getting some golden mound bushes and some inpatients. We've got all that stuff planted and the mulch in and it looks awesome!
Now we have to finish up our regular weekend chores and try to figure out what we want to have for dinner. I hope you all had a nice weekend too. Don't forget to check out all the pictures in both albums!!
Saturday morning we all got up bright and early, put on our best pink get ups, and headed out to the Strides Against Breast Cancer walk. I was shocked by how emotional it was for me. When I was planning it I thought, oh this will be a nice thing to do and it'll make me feel like I'm doing something to help. It was so much more than that though. When we signed in we were given the opportunity to write who we were walking for on a little placard that we pinned to the backs of our shirts. Something about writing, "Favorite Aunt Patti" on that placard was just so overwhelming. I don't know if that's when it hit me, the gravity of what she's going through/been through but I just started to tear up. And seeing all the people that were there who were survivors of cancer or those who were there to support someone they knew that had cancer or even those walking in honor of someone who died from cancer. It was amazing. But I'm so glad we did it. I think they said that all the participants of the walk we did raised over 1.2 million dollars!! That makes me feel so good. And we all agreed that we want to do it again. Go Patti's Perky Posse!!
While I was walking for the cure, Joe was home prepping the yard for landscaping. He pulled out all our old hedges and took them to the dump, prepped the bed with landscaping mat stuff and got it all smoothed and ready to go for today. We had already planned on going out to dinner that night so we left our landscaping behind and headed out for some sushi. After that, Joe talked me into a movie so we went to see Quarantine. I have no idea why I agreed to see that movie. I purposely shield myself from scary movies because my over-active imagination always gets the best of me. I probably watched 20 minutes of the movie and spent the rest of the hour and 10 minutes with my eyes covered. But even just hearing the movie was enough to scare the crap out of me. If you like scary movies, you'll like Quarantine. It is shot Blair Witch/Cloverfield style but the acting was very good. You truly believe that the characters are scared out of their minds. If you don't like scary movies, stay away!!
Today Joe and I got up nice and early and headed out to Home Depot to get our plants for the yard. It didn't immediately go so well. The plants that we had originally picked out were no longer available so we had to decide on other stuff. We both disagreed about what to get or what would work so we decided to go to Lowe's (across the street) to see what they had. Well, we weren't impressed with that selection either so we went back to Home Depot. The sales people at stores like that are so unhelpful. They really have no idea what they're talking about. We picked out a small bush that we liked and asked the lady in the garden department how big it would get. She said it wouldn't get much bigger than it already was, which was like 12" tall. So we bought some of those and some azaleas and our Fox Tail palm and headed home. When we got here we noticed that our neighbor has the exact same bushes that we bought but his are like 3 and a half feet tall! Dumb Home Depot lady. We ended up taking those back and going to another garden place down in Rockledge, which is now officially my new favorite place, and getting some golden mound bushes and some inpatients. We've got all that stuff planted and the mulch in and it looks awesome!
Now we have to finish up our regular weekend chores and try to figure out what we want to have for dinner. I hope you all had a nice weekend too. Don't forget to check out all the pictures in both albums!!
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Big Fat Funk
Hey ya'll. Hope you're all doing well out there in the world. Sorry for the lack of posts lately but I have been really unmotivated to do much of anything lately... especially blog. Its hard to be witty and write clever things when I feel so blah. I have an idea what might be causing my funk but, to be honest, its a self diagnosis and is probably not right. I am most likely trying to find an excuse for being a lazy turd.
Things here have been pretty good. Work is kind of weird and tense and stressful since our contract changeover and the lay off of several of my co-workers. After the changeover I just started to see my supervisors and co-workers in a different light. It makes me feel like I'd better mind my p's and q's or its off to the unemployment line for me. They tell me all the time how great they think I am but for some reason it just doesn't seem genuine anymore. Also, since we've lost so many people in our department, the work load has gone way up. Its definitely been a crazy couple of weeks.
I have some exciting things coming up for this weekend. Our team, Patti's Perky Posse will be walking in the Strides Against Breast Cancer walk on Saturday. Thank you so much to everyone who made a donation. Our team greatly overshot our goal of $250 and have raised $450!!! I doubt we'll be bringing home any medals on Saturday but I'm sure we'll have fun. I did read about the funniest and best fundraising idea the other day. A group of students from UCF were raising money for their walk team, while tailgating at the game, with the slogan, "Save Second Base". LOL... So clever. They all wore pink UCF shirts (even the guys) and had a sign up on their tailgating tent that said, "Donate if you like Boobies". I thought that was such a great idea. Good job UCF students!!
Also this weekend, Joe and I have decided were finally going to tackle the landscaping in the front of our house. Wish us luck because this has disaster written all over it! We really have no idea what we're doing. We know we want a palm tree and have already picked out a Fox Tail Palm for one side of the house. We also know that we're going to transplant a Sego Palm from the back yard to the front. We know that our house gets shade for pretty much the whole day so we have to be careful to pick shade-loving plants. But, picking out plants is really hard. We found some that we both agree on but both feel like it might be too bare. I guess we can get in the stuff we know we like and then go from there. I will definitely be posting pictures in the renovation album so check that out this weekend. I just hope we don't go spend a lot of time and money and then have everything die. Fingers crossed!!
I would like to finish out this blog post with a couple of rants that I've been saving up. I was having a rough day at work today and was annoyed by just about everything. I emailed myself from work with a list of things that were pissing me off. Here are a few:
Burnt popcorn- why, oh why, would someone put a bag of popcorn in the microwave and walk away? It says very clearly on the bag to LISTEN for popping and, when it slows, to remove the popcorn from the microwave. And really, how many grown ups are there that have never heard those instructions and/or have experienced a burnt bag of popcorn and know better? I know for a fact that one of my training videos when I started my job was completely dedicated to burning popcorn in the microwave. I hate the way burnt popcorn smells, its terrible and hangs in the air for what seems like hours. Let this be a warning to all of you, stay near the microwave when popping popcorn or it very likely will burn.... and I'll be pissed!
Office parties- office parties can be so annoying. I understand that some people may want to celebrate occasions with their co-workers but sometimes the parties can get out of hand. A lot of times the birthday parties end up like the scene on Office Space where they all have to sing Happy Birthday for Lumberg's birthday... if you haven't seen it you NEED to watch that movie! The parties usually end up with people standing around eating cake and making awkward chit chat. Well, I just got hit with a new party today. On Thursday, my department will be celebrating Boss's Day. Or, "let's see how many people can suck up to the Boss's Day". I didn't get shit for Secretary/Administrative Professional's Day. Not that I wanted to, that's just another party to attend, but still! So, here's the routine, the co-workers start passing around a list of things you can bring. Keep in mind we've already had 3 or 4 parties in the last two months. I've brought broccoli salad to 2, cookies to one and dip to another. And bringing something is such a pain to transport to work and then wash your dish and take it back home... So this time I offered to pitch in money. Well, some dumb bitch has decided that she wants us to pitch in for hot dogs and buns at $5 a piece!! Huh?! I know hot dogs and know they don't cost that much! So, I offered to bring a packet of hot dogs and buns. I'm not financing someone else's groceries for the week!
Pushy a-holes- I understand that by working in a very customer service focused environment that I'll be faced with my share of pushy a-holes. But some pushy a-holes take it a little too far. I had a guy today bring in this huge binder, full of tabs, that he need reproduced THE SAME DAY! I know that a lot of you don't know how much work that is, but its a lot. I took one look at the binder and told him we couldn't do it today, that we could maybe have it done tomorrow. He looked at me and said, "well I really need it today". Well, I'm sorry, you'll have to take it somewhere else then. What, did you think my saying no was just bluff? But, he insisted. So, I took his job in and told him I'd see what we could do. As I was leaving this afternoon his job was still sitting on the counter waiting to be done. And honestly, he probably won't get it tomorrow either. I hate when people are unprepared to do their job and rush in like its my problem. I heard a saying, "lack of preparation on your part does not constitute a rush on my part". You know what makes these pushy a-holes even worse? They'll come in demanding a rush on their work, that they need it ASAP. Then, when we do rush to get it done, they leave it sitting for days, or weeks even, waiting to be picked up. What was the rush, so you could go home early? God, that just pisses me off!
My last two rants are really with myself. Along with my overall feeling of blah I've also been feeling very fat and disgusting. For some reason I'm having an aversion to all healthy foods. I only want to eat junk, fried food, salty, sugary, you name it. I've been choking down bananas and carrots and salad but I'm completely unsatisfied by all of it. Like right now I think I could down several pieces of cake. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) there is no cake in my house. I'm still going to the gym and working really hard but the weight is going nowhere. Actually, that's not true, the weight is going up! Its very frustrating and I don't know what to do. All I want to do is lay around and eat. I've been doing the "whoa is me" and the "its not fair" routines but that gets me nowhere. I don't know where my funk came from but its got me in its fat, greasy grip and it is not letting go.
Maybe new landscaping will help... I'll keep you posted.
Things here have been pretty good. Work is kind of weird and tense and stressful since our contract changeover and the lay off of several of my co-workers. After the changeover I just started to see my supervisors and co-workers in a different light. It makes me feel like I'd better mind my p's and q's or its off to the unemployment line for me. They tell me all the time how great they think I am but for some reason it just doesn't seem genuine anymore. Also, since we've lost so many people in our department, the work load has gone way up. Its definitely been a crazy couple of weeks.
I have some exciting things coming up for this weekend. Our team, Patti's Perky Posse will be walking in the Strides Against Breast Cancer walk on Saturday. Thank you so much to everyone who made a donation. Our team greatly overshot our goal of $250 and have raised $450!!! I doubt we'll be bringing home any medals on Saturday but I'm sure we'll have fun. I did read about the funniest and best fundraising idea the other day. A group of students from UCF were raising money for their walk team, while tailgating at the game, with the slogan, "Save Second Base". LOL... So clever. They all wore pink UCF shirts (even the guys) and had a sign up on their tailgating tent that said, "Donate if you like Boobies". I thought that was such a great idea. Good job UCF students!!
Also this weekend, Joe and I have decided were finally going to tackle the landscaping in the front of our house. Wish us luck because this has disaster written all over it! We really have no idea what we're doing. We know we want a palm tree and have already picked out a Fox Tail Palm for one side of the house. We also know that we're going to transplant a Sego Palm from the back yard to the front. We know that our house gets shade for pretty much the whole day so we have to be careful to pick shade-loving plants. But, picking out plants is really hard. We found some that we both agree on but both feel like it might be too bare. I guess we can get in the stuff we know we like and then go from there. I will definitely be posting pictures in the renovation album so check that out this weekend. I just hope we don't go spend a lot of time and money and then have everything die. Fingers crossed!!
I would like to finish out this blog post with a couple of rants that I've been saving up. I was having a rough day at work today and was annoyed by just about everything. I emailed myself from work with a list of things that were pissing me off. Here are a few:
Burnt popcorn- why, oh why, would someone put a bag of popcorn in the microwave and walk away? It says very clearly on the bag to LISTEN for popping and, when it slows, to remove the popcorn from the microwave. And really, how many grown ups are there that have never heard those instructions and/or have experienced a burnt bag of popcorn and know better? I know for a fact that one of my training videos when I started my job was completely dedicated to burning popcorn in the microwave. I hate the way burnt popcorn smells, its terrible and hangs in the air for what seems like hours. Let this be a warning to all of you, stay near the microwave when popping popcorn or it very likely will burn.... and I'll be pissed!
Office parties- office parties can be so annoying. I understand that some people may want to celebrate occasions with their co-workers but sometimes the parties can get out of hand. A lot of times the birthday parties end up like the scene on Office Space where they all have to sing Happy Birthday for Lumberg's birthday... if you haven't seen it you NEED to watch that movie! The parties usually end up with people standing around eating cake and making awkward chit chat. Well, I just got hit with a new party today. On Thursday, my department will be celebrating Boss's Day. Or, "let's see how many people can suck up to the Boss's Day". I didn't get shit for Secretary/Administrative Professional's Day. Not that I wanted to, that's just another party to attend, but still! So, here's the routine, the co-workers start passing around a list of things you can bring. Keep in mind we've already had 3 or 4 parties in the last two months. I've brought broccoli salad to 2, cookies to one and dip to another. And bringing something is such a pain to transport to work and then wash your dish and take it back home... So this time I offered to pitch in money. Well, some dumb bitch has decided that she wants us to pitch in for hot dogs and buns at $5 a piece!! Huh?! I know hot dogs and know they don't cost that much! So, I offered to bring a packet of hot dogs and buns. I'm not financing someone else's groceries for the week!
Pushy a-holes- I understand that by working in a very customer service focused environment that I'll be faced with my share of pushy a-holes. But some pushy a-holes take it a little too far. I had a guy today bring in this huge binder, full of tabs, that he need reproduced THE SAME DAY! I know that a lot of you don't know how much work that is, but its a lot. I took one look at the binder and told him we couldn't do it today, that we could maybe have it done tomorrow. He looked at me and said, "well I really need it today". Well, I'm sorry, you'll have to take it somewhere else then. What, did you think my saying no was just bluff? But, he insisted. So, I took his job in and told him I'd see what we could do. As I was leaving this afternoon his job was still sitting on the counter waiting to be done. And honestly, he probably won't get it tomorrow either. I hate when people are unprepared to do their job and rush in like its my problem. I heard a saying, "lack of preparation on your part does not constitute a rush on my part". You know what makes these pushy a-holes even worse? They'll come in demanding a rush on their work, that they need it ASAP. Then, when we do rush to get it done, they leave it sitting for days, or weeks even, waiting to be picked up. What was the rush, so you could go home early? God, that just pisses me off!
My last two rants are really with myself. Along with my overall feeling of blah I've also been feeling very fat and disgusting. For some reason I'm having an aversion to all healthy foods. I only want to eat junk, fried food, salty, sugary, you name it. I've been choking down bananas and carrots and salad but I'm completely unsatisfied by all of it. Like right now I think I could down several pieces of cake. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) there is no cake in my house. I'm still going to the gym and working really hard but the weight is going nowhere. Actually, that's not true, the weight is going up! Its very frustrating and I don't know what to do. All I want to do is lay around and eat. I've been doing the "whoa is me" and the "its not fair" routines but that gets me nowhere. I don't know where my funk came from but its got me in its fat, greasy grip and it is not letting go.
Maybe new landscaping will help... I'll keep you posted.
Monday, October 6, 2008
Oh hot damn...
Back in July I did a blog about some of my favorites. Well, I already have some more favorites and wanted to write a quick blog to let you all know about some of the awesome stuff I've come across lately.
New favorite websites:
I get very bored with the Internet and am always looking for fun, new websites. I love Perez but I check it so often the poor guy can't keep up! So, I've found some other favorites that I can go to in a pinch.
www.cuteoverload.com This is probably the cutest, make you smile website. I always love to go here when I'm down in the dumps or just really need something to cheer me up. Its pretty much just pictures of really cute animals with completely over-the-top, almost too silly descriptions. I'm telling you, one visit to this site and you'll be hooked.
www.passiveaggressivenotes.com This site makes me laugh my ass off. It is pictures of letters/notes that people received from roommates, neighbors, co-workers, etc. that are hilariously passive aggressive. The notes range on subjects from eating someone else's food in the refrigerator without permission to not cleaning up after your dog. All hilarious.
www.someecards.com The anti-Hallmark. This site has an e-card for EVERY occasion/subject. Some are incredibly inappropriate and may make you blush. Some of them definitely made me blush. You have to make sure your friend has an equally twisted sense of humor before you send a card from this site because you could easily offend someone. Either way, reading the cards is a laugh out loud good time.
www.endless.com The shoe lovers dream website!! I can get lost on this site for hours. I'm not kidding, hours. They have shoes that range from inexpensive to very expensive. This may be the most user friendly shopping site I've ever visited. You can browse by shoe type, designer, color, heel height, or price, or any combination of the above. And the best part about it, they offer FREE, next day delivery!! Its almost instant gratification. I ordered a pair of shoes last Thursday and they were waiting on my doorstep Friday afternoon when I got home.
I also have a new favorite play list for the gym that I wanted to share. I put my i-pod on shuffle so these aren't in any particular order:
Baby Got Back- Sir Mix Alot, conjures up images of big butts, the perfect motivation to work out
Dignity- Hilary Duff, fast paced and dancy and talks shit about the Hollywood "It" girls
Freakshow- Britney Spears, I think this is the hidden gem off the Blackout album
In these shoes- Kristy Maccoll, you Sex and the City watchers may recognize this one
Jump- Madonna, This was on The Devil Wears Prada soundtrack but the words are motivating
Low- Flo Rida, Booty shaking music at its best
When I grow up- Pussycat Dolls, They may be ho-ish but they can make a good dance song
Lolli Lolli- 36 Mafia- I get lost in the beat of this song... its good for getting over the hump
Break the Ice- Britney Spears, Good beat, catchy lyrics, makes you want to move
Piece of me- Britney Spears, This is kind of pump me up song- you wanna piece of me?
Let it rock- Kevin Rudolf, Lots of rap in this song but the chorus will make you want to move
So what- Pink, The girl anthem of the year! She's bad ass and will make you feel like you are too
In the Ayer- Flo Rida, The song that inspired the title of this blog. Warning- this may make you spontaneously throw your hands "in the ayer" so be careful.
Well, that's it for now. I'll keep posting my favorites as they come up. I hope you guys get some laughs from the websites and use the play list to get your booties shakin'.
New favorite websites:
I get very bored with the Internet and am always looking for fun, new websites. I love Perez but I check it so often the poor guy can't keep up! So, I've found some other favorites that I can go to in a pinch.
www.cuteoverload.com This is probably the cutest, make you smile website. I always love to go here when I'm down in the dumps or just really need something to cheer me up. Its pretty much just pictures of really cute animals with completely over-the-top, almost too silly descriptions. I'm telling you, one visit to this site and you'll be hooked.
www.passiveaggressivenotes.com This site makes me laugh my ass off. It is pictures of letters/notes that people received from roommates, neighbors, co-workers, etc. that are hilariously passive aggressive. The notes range on subjects from eating someone else's food in the refrigerator without permission to not cleaning up after your dog. All hilarious.
www.someecards.com The anti-Hallmark. This site has an e-card for EVERY occasion/subject. Some are incredibly inappropriate and may make you blush. Some of them definitely made me blush. You have to make sure your friend has an equally twisted sense of humor before you send a card from this site because you could easily offend someone. Either way, reading the cards is a laugh out loud good time.
www.endless.com The shoe lovers dream website!! I can get lost on this site for hours. I'm not kidding, hours. They have shoes that range from inexpensive to very expensive. This may be the most user friendly shopping site I've ever visited. You can browse by shoe type, designer, color, heel height, or price, or any combination of the above. And the best part about it, they offer FREE, next day delivery!! Its almost instant gratification. I ordered a pair of shoes last Thursday and they were waiting on my doorstep Friday afternoon when I got home.
I also have a new favorite play list for the gym that I wanted to share. I put my i-pod on shuffle so these aren't in any particular order:
Baby Got Back- Sir Mix Alot, conjures up images of big butts, the perfect motivation to work out
Dignity- Hilary Duff, fast paced and dancy and talks shit about the Hollywood "It" girls
Freakshow- Britney Spears, I think this is the hidden gem off the Blackout album
In these shoes- Kristy Maccoll, you Sex and the City watchers may recognize this one
Jump- Madonna, This was on The Devil Wears Prada soundtrack but the words are motivating
Low- Flo Rida, Booty shaking music at its best
When I grow up- Pussycat Dolls, They may be ho-ish but they can make a good dance song
Lolli Lolli- 36 Mafia- I get lost in the beat of this song... its good for getting over the hump
Break the Ice- Britney Spears, Good beat, catchy lyrics, makes you want to move
Piece of me- Britney Spears, This is kind of pump me up song- you wanna piece of me?
Let it rock- Kevin Rudolf, Lots of rap in this song but the chorus will make you want to move
So what- Pink, The girl anthem of the year! She's bad ass and will make you feel like you are too
In the Ayer- Flo Rida, The song that inspired the title of this blog. Warning- this may make you spontaneously throw your hands "in the ayer" so be careful.
Well, that's it for now. I'll keep posting my favorites as they come up. I hope you guys get some laughs from the websites and use the play list to get your booties shakin'.
Sunday, October 5, 2008
Meh...
We had our big night out on Friday night. Joe and I went to see Joel McHale at Hard Rock Live in Orlando. We are HUGE Soup fans and thought that Joel would be hilarious. I have to say he was just ok. He talked a lot about people that he talks about on The Soup so it almost seemed like we'd heard a bunch of the jokes before. He did talk a little about his family and that was by far the funniest part of his show.
We did have a really nice time though. We had appetizers and drinks at Hard Rock Cafe before the show and that was fun. It had been a really long time since either of us had been to Hard Rock Cafe so it was interesting to go back. I think I may have had the best cocktail of my life on Friday. Hard to believe, but its true. It was some kind of raspberry margarita... I think. It was a special pink cocktail that donated a portion of the proceeds to breast cancer research so I had to have it. It was the perfect combination of salty, sweet, and tart. Yum!! The appetizers were so-so and the atmosphere was very touristy but it was still fun.
The rest of our weekend has been very lazy. I went to a baby shower yesterday and then spent the rest of the day doing laundry and watching football. My Florida State Seminoles held on to beat the Miami Hurricanes in a very nail biting game. I honestly thought I was going to have a heart attack at one point. There was lots of screaming at the TV and cursing out of players but, in the end, the Noles won... and not by a field goal either!
Today has been even lazier than yesterday. Joe and I finally managed to drag ourselves out to Wal-Mart for some groceries and now we're just waiting for the Bucs game to come on. Next weekend is our fifth wedding anniversary so we're going to work on planning something fun. I hope you all have a great week!
We did have a really nice time though. We had appetizers and drinks at Hard Rock Cafe before the show and that was fun. It had been a really long time since either of us had been to Hard Rock Cafe so it was interesting to go back. I think I may have had the best cocktail of my life on Friday. Hard to believe, but its true. It was some kind of raspberry margarita... I think. It was a special pink cocktail that donated a portion of the proceeds to breast cancer research so I had to have it. It was the perfect combination of salty, sweet, and tart. Yum!! The appetizers were so-so and the atmosphere was very touristy but it was still fun.
The rest of our weekend has been very lazy. I went to a baby shower yesterday and then spent the rest of the day doing laundry and watching football. My Florida State Seminoles held on to beat the Miami Hurricanes in a very nail biting game. I honestly thought I was going to have a heart attack at one point. There was lots of screaming at the TV and cursing out of players but, in the end, the Noles won... and not by a field goal either!
Today has been even lazier than yesterday. Joe and I finally managed to drag ourselves out to Wal-Mart for some groceries and now we're just waiting for the Bucs game to come on. Next weekend is our fifth wedding anniversary so we're going to work on planning something fun. I hope you all have a great week!
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Target is bad
Bad, bad, bad... for me. I had to go to Target after work today to get a baby shower gift for a friend's shower on Saturday. Shopping for a gift for someone else's baby really isn't my favorite activity but I try to stay on the utility aisles, you know, diapers, wipes, the boring stuff, and stay away from the aisles with the adorable, "I love my mommy" bibs. I told myself that I was going to Target on a mission and that I needed to try not to wander. Well, you guessed it.... I wandered.
Let me start my story by filling you in on my new mission for this week. I'm trying to cut back on caffeine. I usually only drink one travel sized mug of coffee a day on the way to work. But, being that I have to get up at the Devil's hour (actual time 5:30am) I sometimes need a little more than a travel mug to get me going. Recently my coffee pots have been getting more and more full. What started at the 4 cup level has somehow creeped to the 8 cup level. I've been having a cup while I get ready for work, then taking my travel mug in the car with me. The other day I started thinking that I was having too much so I had the brilliant idea to stop drinking coffee and switch over to green tea. Yeah, not exactly the same "pick me up" as I'm used to.
I was especially tired this morning. I went to bed at 8:30 last night (!!!!!) and woke up still exhausted. I smudged on some eyeliner to try to camouflage the bags and dark circles and dragged my tired ass to work. I was half asleep the whole day. By the time 4:00 rolled around I had a lack of caffeine headache and regular old end-of-day exhaustion. I figured since I was going to Target anyway, I would get a chai tea latte at Starbucks. I know myself and know that I absolutely cannot, under any circumstances, drink a coffee at 4:00 in the afternoon and expect to sleep anytime before 2am. It just doesn't happen. I can't drink a soda with dinner because it keeps me awake. But, I thought a tea would be ok. Tea can't have nearly as much caffeine as a coffee, right? Wrong... almost. I have discovered, through a pretty simple check of the nutrition info on starbucks.com, that a chai latte only has 50mg of caffeine less than a caramel latte. So, needless to say, I'm pretty awake right now.
I'm getting completely off topic though. So, I'm in Target, I'm drinking my glorious chai tea latte, a soothing wave of warm black tea with spicy flavors is pulsing through me, and the aisles of new displays are welcoming me in. I'm intoxicated with shopping endorphins, everything I see just keeps getting cuter and cuter, bad Tricia is hitting good Tricia over the head with a new purse telling her that she needs to buy, buy, buy! Every rack of clothes is like a splendid surprise. I spent a while responsibly sizing up every item and how it would work perfectly into my current wardrobe, telling myself that I had to have it.
I decided my best bet would be to do what I came to Target to do and then I could come back and look at stuff for me. So, off to the baby department I went. I spent a while analyzing the registry and picked out my gifts and somehow ended up in the home section. This is where things really got crazy. I guess the best way to describe my time in the home section is to tell you that I want to redecorate my whole house... again. Well, ok, maybe not my whole house but at least my master bedroom, office, and guest room... and some pictures for the kitchen, and the family room... and maybe some pillows for the family room... and some new towels for the guest bathroom. Oh yeah, and then I need decorations for Halloween... and then Joe's family will be here for Thanksgiving so I have to get decorations for that. You ses my dilemma?
I was on information overload. I picked out like 5 bedding sets for my master bedroom. They are all completely different and, of course, would need Joe's stamp of approval before I could bring one home. I'm leaning towards a "greige" theme. Its a combination of grey and beige that is totally awesome and pretty and can be accessorized in lots of different ways. Out of all the redecorating that I did in my head today, that will probably be the first project to get done.
I am very proud of myself overall though. After all the oohing and ahhing over everything in Target, I managed to walk out with only what I went in to get in the first place, a baby shower gift. I can't say that there won't be return trips to pick up some of the "must-haves" from today but at least I suppressed my urge to buy for one day.
I have a very exciting weekend coming up. Joe and I are going to see Joel McHale (The Soup) tomorrow night at the Hard Rock Live. We think he's hilarious and are really excited to see him do stand up. I'll give you all the details at some point over the weekend. Enjoy!!
Let me start my story by filling you in on my new mission for this week. I'm trying to cut back on caffeine. I usually only drink one travel sized mug of coffee a day on the way to work. But, being that I have to get up at the Devil's hour (actual time 5:30am) I sometimes need a little more than a travel mug to get me going. Recently my coffee pots have been getting more and more full. What started at the 4 cup level has somehow creeped to the 8 cup level. I've been having a cup while I get ready for work, then taking my travel mug in the car with me. The other day I started thinking that I was having too much so I had the brilliant idea to stop drinking coffee and switch over to green tea. Yeah, not exactly the same "pick me up" as I'm used to.
I was especially tired this morning. I went to bed at 8:30 last night (!!!!!) and woke up still exhausted. I smudged on some eyeliner to try to camouflage the bags and dark circles and dragged my tired ass to work. I was half asleep the whole day. By the time 4:00 rolled around I had a lack of caffeine headache and regular old end-of-day exhaustion. I figured since I was going to Target anyway, I would get a chai tea latte at Starbucks. I know myself and know that I absolutely cannot, under any circumstances, drink a coffee at 4:00 in the afternoon and expect to sleep anytime before 2am. It just doesn't happen. I can't drink a soda with dinner because it keeps me awake. But, I thought a tea would be ok. Tea can't have nearly as much caffeine as a coffee, right? Wrong... almost. I have discovered, through a pretty simple check of the nutrition info on starbucks.com, that a chai latte only has 50mg of caffeine less than a caramel latte. So, needless to say, I'm pretty awake right now.
I'm getting completely off topic though. So, I'm in Target, I'm drinking my glorious chai tea latte, a soothing wave of warm black tea with spicy flavors is pulsing through me, and the aisles of new displays are welcoming me in. I'm intoxicated with shopping endorphins, everything I see just keeps getting cuter and cuter, bad Tricia is hitting good Tricia over the head with a new purse telling her that she needs to buy, buy, buy! Every rack of clothes is like a splendid surprise. I spent a while responsibly sizing up every item and how it would work perfectly into my current wardrobe, telling myself that I had to have it.
I decided my best bet would be to do what I came to Target to do and then I could come back and look at stuff for me. So, off to the baby department I went. I spent a while analyzing the registry and picked out my gifts and somehow ended up in the home section. This is where things really got crazy. I guess the best way to describe my time in the home section is to tell you that I want to redecorate my whole house... again. Well, ok, maybe not my whole house but at least my master bedroom, office, and guest room... and some pictures for the kitchen, and the family room... and maybe some pillows for the family room... and some new towels for the guest bathroom. Oh yeah, and then I need decorations for Halloween... and then Joe's family will be here for Thanksgiving so I have to get decorations for that. You ses my dilemma?
I was on information overload. I picked out like 5 bedding sets for my master bedroom. They are all completely different and, of course, would need Joe's stamp of approval before I could bring one home. I'm leaning towards a "greige" theme. Its a combination of grey and beige that is totally awesome and pretty and can be accessorized in lots of different ways. Out of all the redecorating that I did in my head today, that will probably be the first project to get done.
I am very proud of myself overall though. After all the oohing and ahhing over everything in Target, I managed to walk out with only what I went in to get in the first place, a baby shower gift. I can't say that there won't be return trips to pick up some of the "must-haves" from today but at least I suppressed my urge to buy for one day.
I have a very exciting weekend coming up. Joe and I are going to see Joel McHale (The Soup) tomorrow night at the Hard Rock Live. We think he's hilarious and are really excited to see him do stand up. I'll give you all the details at some point over the weekend. Enjoy!!
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