You all know how much I loath cleaning. I've talked about it here in embarrassing detail before. But, it's a necessary evil, and I hate bugs and dirt, so I am obligated to do it. I came across an article on MarthaStewart.com that talked about the guide to spring cleaning. I know it isn't spring but I've never really done a "spring cleaning" so I wanted to see what Martha suggested. What I learned from the article is that either I am the worst housekeeper ever or that Martha Stewart is a crazy, sadistic clean freak who gets her jollies from destroying dust bunnies.
I was shocked at the things Martha says I should be doing on an annual basis. Cleaning the refrigerator coils? Washing the window screens? Wash outdoor light covers? Huh?! I've lived here for more than three years and have never done any of that. Is that bad? Is that something that you people out there are doing? Why was I never taught that these were necessary things? I was intrigued and wanted to find out what else I wasn't doing that I was supposed to.
I found another section, "Routine Cleaning". Apparently, these are the things that I should be doing regularly throughout the week. Again, I was shocked while reading the suggestions. Hand washing the burners on the stove once a week? Removing the stove knobs to wash? Soaking the oven racks? Removing and cleaning the filter in the vent hood? (I didn't even know that one was possible) Cleaning the cabinets once a week? Washing the trash can once a week? Who has time for all that shit? Do you all do that stuff? Am I a crazy, dirty slob?
I do stuff that I think is necessary. I dust once a week or so and I wipe down my kitchen counters every night but some of the other stuff suggested just doesn't cross my mind until the dirt is no longer avoidable. I don't clean my blinds on a regular basis. I only vacuum my floors like once a week and I only mop when I really have to, probably every two weeks. I don't vacuum my furniture regularly and I don't clean my sliding glass door, my mirrored closet doors or the french door in my family room. I know that my house isn't sparkling and spotless but I guess I never realized what all I wasn't doing that needed to be done.
I suppose what I'm trying to figure out with this blog is if I'm a slacker or if I'm just like the rest of you. Are you all following Martha's suggestions for a super clean and shiny home or do you all just do what's necessary to get by? If you fall into the former category please let me know how you get the clock to stop everyday so you can fit all that extra crap in. Thanks!
7 comments:
Let me be the first to tell you, Martha is whack! The bitch is nuts. I've been in my house over 2 years and have only cleaned the sliding door once. Fridge coils? Where do you find those? I had a cleaning lady before I had my second baby and the paid professionals don't even suggest that shit! Who has time? I am offended that Martha would even publish such bullshit and I even refuse to think of how to even go about soaking my oven racks. Haven't cleaned out my cabinets in a LONG time either. Well just have faith that you are not alone in the cleaning crusade and Martha is a frigging KOOK! Love you!
Don't show Jeff this article because he would be the first to try and clean ALL of that crap!!! He cleans the little windows on the garage door! Oh yes he is Martha in disguise!!! You are not a slacker...I only do the necessary things to keep my house clean too so don't feel bad. There are people (monster-in-law) that do go above and beyond to get their houses that clean but it's only because they have NOTHING else to do!
Good! I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought that was crazy. I feel much better now!
I won't even go there. Martha would die of dust inhalation if she ever came to my house. If the dust doesn't get her, the dog hair, dirty clothes piles, dishes in the sink, throw up rags and whatever else she might find...will certainly get her.
I'm right up there with you-----none of you kids died from dust and I was thankful that you did not have allergies---just like the top of the refrigerator---I can't see it until I have to get a stool to get out wine glasses--then I see the top of the refrigerator and I have two glasses instead of one-----FYI---Dad cleans the refrigerator coils!!!! Love MOM
Uh, oh. Don't hate me because I'm beautiful or spoiled. Richard is the major cleaner in our house, all I know is it's clean when I come home from work. How often he does what is a clue to me. Refrigerator coils is another thing. I think we tackle that together about twice a year. What a pain in the butt, but you can tell when it needs to be done because the refrigerator runs harder (ie. gasping for air!). Yep, I do the screens, usually in the spring and replace them if necessary - I'm a real whiz with the spliner! Love you guys!
Aunt Leanne, would you consider leasing Richard out for a deep cleaning of my house? LOL... You're very lucky!
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